Feeling Lost After Years of Bullying

I’m really sorry you’ve been through so much. It sounds incredibly overwhelming. I went through something similar in school, and I still struggle with the effects. One thing that helped me was therapy—specifically, cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT). It helped me reframe my thoughts and slowly rebuild my self-esteem. I also started keeping a journal where I could express my feelings without fear of judgment. You might want to try something like that, just to have a safe space for your thoughts. Healing is a journey, and it’s okay to take it one step at a time. You’re not alone in this.

I just want to say that it’s completely okay to feel lost after everything you’ve been through. What happened to you was unfair, and it’s not surprising that it has left you questioning who you are. The fact that you’re even thinking about rebuilding yourself shows incredible strength. Please remember that your value isn’t tied to the way others treated you. One step at a time, you’ll find pieces of yourself again. Maybe try something new—a hobby, a sport, or a class—something that’s just for you, where you can explore who you are without any pressure. And if you ever need someone to talk to, I’m here.

Your post really hit home for me. I spent so many years feeling lost, trying to be someone else just to avoid the pain of being bullied. It’s exhausting, and it really messes with your sense of self. But the fact that you’re recognizing this and wanting to make a change is a powerful first step.

One thing that helped me was finding ways to reconnect with who I was before the bullying started. I looked back at things I used to love as a kid—drawing, writing stories, even certain music—and I started to bring those things back into my life. It was like reconnecting with an old friend, one I hadn’t seen in years.

I also started practicing positive affirmations. It felt weird at first, but over time, telling myself that I am worthy, that I am strong, started to shift my mindset. You might feel silly saying these things to yourself, but they can have a big impact on how you view yourself.

And finally, know that it’s okay to ask for help. Whether it’s talking to a therapist, joining a support group, or even just confiding in a close friend, you don’t have to go through this alone. Healing takes time, but every step you take is a step towards reclaiming your identity and building the self-esteem that the bullies tried to take from you.

First of all, I want to say that I’m really proud of you for reaching out and sharing this. It takes a lot of courage to be vulnerable, especially when you’ve been hurt so many times before.

I think one of the hardest parts of healing from bullying is learning to trust yourself again—to believe that you’re worthy of love and respect. One thing that’s helped me is to take small steps towards self-discovery. Start by exploring what you like, what you believe in, without worrying about what others think. It could be as simple as reading books that interest you, trying out new activities, or even just spending time in nature. These small moments can help you reconnect with yourself.

It’s also important to confront those painful memories, but in a way that doesn’t overwhelm you. Sometimes writing letters to your younger self, or to those who hurt you (that you never send), can be a powerful way to release some of that pain. It’s like giving yourself permission to feel hurt, but also to move on.

Lastly, be patient with yourself. Healing isn’t a linear process, and there will be days when it feels like you’re back at square one. But each time you get up, each time you take a step forward, you’re building something new—a stronger, more resilient version of yourself. You deserve that, and you’re capable of it.